Is 70 the new 50?

Gasping for air, I search far ahead for the top of the hill.  Sweat blinds my sight making it hard to focus and my heart pounds in my ears.  My legs are screaming at me as I crank my pedals and dig down deep for the strength and will to keep grinding away up this grade, trying to remind myself that I like being a cyclist.  

 

“How are you doing, Cristy?”

 

This friendly voice comes from behind followed by a bright smile that could light up a room.

 

“Doing okay, Gene,” I reply as he sails right past me like I’m backing up.  

 

Meet Gene.

 

On his bike every day, Gene is a force to be reckoned with.  Having been a cyclist for YEARS and YEARS, there is nothing Gene hasn’t done.  He will ride any big ride this side of the Mason-Dixon.  He rides with the big boys, leads the pace line and holds his own on any hill.  Trying to keep up with Gene is a challenge and I learn from him every time I have the privilege of being on his wheel.  And guess what?  Gene is 73 years old.  (What did she say?  Did she say 73?)  Yes, I said 73.  I went to his birthday party a couple of weeks ago.  Gene is 73!

 

 

My phone rings and the woman on the other end is kind and gentle.  She tells me she heard me speak at St. Alphonsus Health Fair 6 months ago and would like to hire me as her personal trainer.  At our first meeting, in walks this beautiful woman, hand outstretched to shake mine.  “Are you Cristy?”

 

Meet Barbara.  

 

Barbara just glowed with gorgeous skin, a nice tight figure and hair like a Disney princess.  Barbara had been stuck in a rut with her workouts and needed some fresh new ideas.  I began her on some High Intensity Interval Training and heavy weight lifting.  There was absolutely NOTHING she couldn’t do.  She didn’t say no, she didn’t falter.  She stepped up to every challenge from bosu ball squats to bench press to jumping rope to “farmers walk.”  She was doing plyometrics better than my 22 year old client. After a set of “renegade rows” one day, I asked, “Are you sure you’re 73 years old???”

So what’s happening here?  Is 70 the new 50?  Is this a trend we will continue to see as the baby boomers age?  Not only are we seeing–and will continue seeing–a change in the way people view their health and fitness but also a new “can-do” attitude among the older adult.  There is NOTHING Gene and Barbara can’t do.  I threw everything at Barbara but the kitchen sink and she keep coming back for more each week.  Her arms got firmer, her heart and lungs got stronger.  One arm push ups?  No problem.  15% incline at 4MPH?  No problem.  A 210 mile ride from Portland to Seattle without stopping?  Gene doesn’t think that’s a big deal.  

 

The moral of the story is that Gene and Barbara (and others like them) have made a choice to live a healthy, fit lifestyle.  They CHOOSE to exercise every day and not sit around watching football or knitting all day long.  Those who don’t make this choice are the ones who look their age and complain about their aches and pains, constantly go to the doctor and try to medicate away “old age.”  

 

What will you choose?     

 

 

Til death do us part?

I’m not sure how my parents are gonna feel about this blog.  Of course, I’m 35 years old so I don’t know why I still worry about what my parents think.  But I guess everyone still wants their parent’s approval.  Anyway, I’ve never been shy about my past.  I put myself out there so that others will maybe learn from what I’ve done or at maybe follow in my footsteps of having courage.  I’ve lived life to the fullest and never let anything hold me back.

Since I was young, I’ve wanted to be married.  I never wanted to have children but I’ve always wanted to be married.  I married Jason Nickel in 2000 and Chad Bloxham 10 years later.  Aside from a few mistakes here and there, I am a good wife.  I love being a wife.  I believe in the institution of marriage and the level of commitment.  I love the way the ring feels on my finger and I love saying “my husband.”  Jason was/is a good man but we were TOO YOUNG to be married.  Early 20’s.  I did so much changing in my 20’s.   I never really figured out who I was and who I wanted to be until I reached age 30.  

 

Although nowadays people are waiting til they’re older to get married, the divorce rate is still high.  And get this:  1 in 4 divorces are people over age 50.  Almost everyone I know has been divorced.  In fact, it’s rare to find people still married, like my folks, who will celebrate 41 years of marriage this June.  

 

So why is this happening?  Or better yet how can we fix it?  Our society continues to evolve so why haven’t our marriage vows evolved?  Why do we continue to say “til death do us part?”  Maybe we shouldn’t expect so much from each other or ourselves.  How about we vow to commit the next 5 years to each other and re-evaluate things then.  I know what you’re thinking.  “Oh Cristy, I love him!  I want to be with him forever!  Our love is different.”  No, not it’s not.  Your love is NOT different, your man is not different and YOU are NOT different.  You have no idea how you will feel about your spouse in 5 or 10 years.  You might change, he might change.  You just DON’T know.  So instead of feeling guilty about the change, living miserably, or being overrun with incredible sorrow, just call it like it is.  Lets allow ourselves the “out” of leaving the marriage after a certain amount of time if it doesn’t work out.  Let’s not expect that death will be the only thing that parts us.

 

As I write, I can think of many rebuttals to my own argument:  kids, money, trading your spouse in for a younger one, etc…  I say, so what?  Co-parent your kids, split up the money and start a new life with someone who will make you happy.  If you are truly in love with your first spouse, nothing will split you both apart.  Perhaps you want to try counseling first, but for crying out loud, don’t live miserably.  Life is too short.

 

So look, if you want to get married, be sure you understand what you’re asking for.  Then perhaps you both can agree to re-evaluate your marriage every 5 years.  It’s just an idea…since the current system is failing miserably.